ten things i know with certainty

1. Nobody really gives a shit about the thing you’re anxious or insecure about, so relax and keep on. Your new haircut looks fine, as does that sweater.

2. Be nice to servers, customer service and your bus driver. Nobody likes a cunt.

3. The ocean and mountains will kill you- you have to respect them. Do so by staying completely away, or at the very least pack some layers and a granola bar.

4. Empathetic and understanding are two of the best things you can be.

5. If you have a shitty heart, things will be shitty.

6. If after you turn 30 years old you can still eat cheese mid-day and go about your business unhindered- call it a win.

7. “Talk shit, get hit.”

8. Walking is still honest.

9. You can totally judge a book by its cover, because that’s where they put the pull-quotes and reviews that will tell you whether or not the book will be of suitable enjoyment to you. But that applies to books and books alone.

10. Drink lots of water.

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